Spent so many years searching for the one who I would love
I didn’t see that you were there all along.
You were such a great friend, but I never saw more,
I had no idea what God had in store.
Then that one fateful day when I looked your way
And I saw you in a new light
But the timing was not right.
But that time did come and I was blown away
By your talent, humor, and charm
All I wanted was to be the girl on your arm.
I clung to every word you said in the phone call that ensued
An hour and ten minutes later, my dream had at last come true.
I had no idea what I was getting into, or how long it would last
All I knew was that this time felt much different than ones past.
You told me you loved me by day sixteen, and I didn’t know what to think
But I said it back, and it took on a new meaning.
The next few months seemed like a blur, and I saw you very little
But I didn’t mind so much, because it made every time more special.
Birthdays passed, and holidays too, but there was still one thing to do
I tried and tried to make it happen, but I was no match for you.
Junior prom soon followed and I was excited to show off my man,
But I never expected the thing that you had planned
That magical moment that was shared,
Was just two days away from our one year.
Year two started and was stronger than ever,
But soon it started to change.
There were more birthdays and more visits
But these time they were not the same.
We just couldn’t seem to find the balance.
Both of us struggling to meet the challenge.
Graduation and celebration in Washington D.C
I was so excited that my grandparents let you come along with me.
This trip was not all I wanted it to be
But at least the tension wasn’t between you and me.
Then came the hardest part of my summer…. two weeks without you
You came back a changed man, but not in the way I expected you to.
A week of camp and acting like I didn’t belong to you
I knew that it was a way to focus, but it wasn’t what I wanted to do.
I knew something was wrong at the end of the week cause you didn’t kiss me goodbye,
It was all I thought about on my way home, and it was so hard not to cry.
But the sadness disappeared a few days later when I heard you were coming by
You didn’t seem all that excited, and I wondered why.
But I soon found out.
I didn’t know how to handle the news, it didn’t seem real
I couldn’t understand how this could happen; I didn’t know what to feel.
I tried to positive; I tried to hold on to hope
But that was not very long lived; I needed a new way to cope.
Anger, bitterness, doubt, and slander became my new norm
This was the beginning of a six month storm.
Crushes formed and I thought of you less and less,
When we did talk it was only a way to prove I wasn’t a mess…that I didn’t need you.
I received a letter filled with hope and love, it was addressed to me from you
I laughed at it, mocked it, and ignored it cause that seemed like what I was supposed to do.
Then all of a sudden, on a most ironic day, I began to think of you again.
It wasn’t in in the ways I had before, it was as a friend.
I began to think of the good old days and how you changed my life
I thought about how much I loved you and how I once wanted to be your wife.
I had to call you.
Your voice was warm and strong, like it was every time,
The only voice that had changed was mine.
After this, we talked daily and I grew finder and fonder,
At night my dreams would take me away and my thoughts began to wonder
Could this happen again?
And it did.
Weeks later and we were back, things were how they were…only better.
They kept getting better as time went on
We were happy, we were wise, we were strong.
But we knew that the credit was not our own.
It belonged to our Father.
I look back on our journey,
Filled with mountains, valleys, and plateaus
But only God knows where our future goes.
BB
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