Weeping Woman

So during Camp Element last year, I was in a skit for the talent show called "Rag Man". I was, ironically, cast as the weeping woman. The point of this skit was to show the gospel and how Jesus came down to take away our rags, or sins, and bear them himself on the cross. It was a really great reminder of just how great a price Jesus paid for us. During the week that I wrote this  I  felt more connected to the character of the weeping woman than ever. I was at a time in my life filled with discomfort, uncertainty, decisions, growth and of course LOTS of tears.This was written shortly after Jacob and I had broken up and I was really struggling to  find joy or find a reason why this was happening to me. Writing this really helped me get through one of the toughest weeks of my life.

I have cried for many things over many years,
But I cannot remember ever having a time where I shed so many tears.
At times I feel broken, confused, angry and sad.
Other times I feel thankful, hopeful and glad.
Trying to find harmony between heart and head,
Yet nearly every night I find myself lying awake in bed. 
My mind is filled with scripture, and words from the wise,
But my heart is still uncertain and starts to believe the lies.
Everyone keeps telling me that it is for the best,
But there is a part of me that likes to think this is a test 
And that tomorrow I will learn I passed
And everything will be ok at last.
But it’s pointless to set expectations or to plan plans
Because I know that my future is not in my hands.
I still feel torn for most of the day
And I try to convince myself that its better this way.
But it seems so unfair.
Seems like you don’t care
But I know you really do.
I just never thought it would be through.
I need your presence to fill the gap left in this broken heart,
I need you to give me a fresh start.
But for now I am just a weeping woman desperate for your love.
I am just a broken heart in need of healing from above.

PLEASE TAKE THIS RAG FROM ME.


BB